Worried

Recently I had been very sick. I had diarrhea for almost 3 weeks to a mth and it had not really recovered. Whenever I eat or drink, I will have a severe pain in my abdomen and it is unbearable. No matter how much painkiller i take the pain only ease for the most 8 hrs. It makes me feel very tired and I have been trying very hard to keep myself awake to concentrate on my job.Due to this problem. Dr. had given me one week MC to rest at home. Today, i had just back to hospital to collect my medical report though the result was negative but Dr still want me to undergo another test. I really hate this cos the sight of seeing needles and tubes inserting here and there really makes my hair stand. I hate this feeling I really want to eat in fact i missing all my favourite food. Actually, I am quite worried about my condition even Dr cannot give me an answer to my condition what is wrong with me. Why is it really stress but i'm not under any work pressure ? I'm enjoying my work. I am feeling very down and I am in a dilemma should i get hospitalize or should not cos if i were to be hospitalised my performance appraisal will be affected. I want to recovered fast but what should i do i cant just let go of my work like this. What should i do? I dont wish to lose my job and i dont wish to be sick too! It's really torturing. I am tired of such life why am i falling sick almost every year even though i had try very hard to lead a healthy lifestyle. I had cut down on my diet and been exercising a lot why am i still sick! If this is the case, i rather choose to die! Everything will then come to an end and no one will feel that i am a burden to my family and i will be much more happier.